I am an advocate of hope, let me tell you my story . .

Welcome to my blog. The purpose for my blog is to provide information concerning cancer and topics surrounding cancer. Since the upstart of my blog, more and more information is available online. I hope my blog might be your one stop in directing you to the information you are looking for.

I also want to bring to your attention a valuable resource on the side bar. I linked other Christian cancer blogs that are cancer specific. When I was in treatment I followed a CaringBridge journal, similar to a blog, about a woman who had lymphoma and was one year ahead of me in her treatment and recovery.

Wendy was my “in the trenches” support, she was so very valuable to me. Not only did I read her journal, she was kind enough to call me occasionally to see how I was doing. In the midst of my storm, Wendy was the ever bright, blinking lighthouse and alerted me to what was coming ahead, and what did come was more fierce than the storm I was already in.

I am in contact with a few of the blog authors. I find their stories compelling and one blog in particular, thought provoking. I am so impressed with their approach to their cancer diagnose and treatment, and for some, recurrence.

During my treatment and recovery I kept a CaringBridge journal documenting the highs and lows of my journey. The link to my journal is found on the side bar. I prefaced the journal with an “introductory” page giving the reader an overview of my CaringBridge journal.

If you are interested to read more about me and my cancer journey on my CaringBridge site, please click on the link to the right. I highlighted a few of what I consider my milestone entries by including the date and page where you can read about that account. What follows here is a copy of my introductory page.

I thank you for your readership. It is my goal for this blog to grow with more articles, information and resources. If you have any suggestions, you may send me a comment by clicking on “Your voice . . . contact me”.

The introduction to my CaringBridge Journal

Book I – From the Beginning

April 29, 2008, pg. 1 – diagnose, chemotherapy protocol, R-hyper-CVAD, followed by an autologous stem cell transplant. My stories and accounts of my treatment phase.

November 4, 2008, pg. 61 – stem cell transplant. My account of my transplant and the effects of high dose chemotherapy, BEAM; the time of engraftment and my release from the hospital and permission to go home, Montana.

• Entries of interest
  • “A Bit of Anger”, December 7, 2008, pg. 6
  • “Going Home”, December 9, 2008, pg. 69

May 6, 2008, the first day of many.

Huntsman Cancer Hospital, Salt Lake City, Utah

May 28, 2008, my son, Chad, flies in from California to visit me!

May 2008.  The kids fly in from California, Chad; Nevada, Christy; and Montana, Carrie!

November 5, 2008.  Proving I can do it!  I face my auto stem cell transplant by a personal challenge of 1/4 mile jog!

Happy Birthday to me!  November 14, 2008, my auto stem cell transplant team.

Released from the hospital and home for Christmas!  A very special Christmas indeed!

Book II – A Distant ThunderMarch 2, 2009, pg. 78 – The accounts of my unexpected, erupting emotions I experienced after coming home. I never anticipated the lostness and confusion I felt in the psychological aftermath of cancer.

February 23, 2009 – 100 day post transplant appointment. Cancer free! Dr. Cao and Greta.

March 14, 2009.  My best four-legged friend, Madaline.

July 17, 2009.  My first Relay for Life event with my cancer support group.

One of many post treatment blood draws. My son, Chad, just happens to be a phlebotomist.

Book III – Depression

December 30, 2009, pg. 94 – PTSD. My time with my therapist, Sally, who helped me with my internal search and the healing of my pain and hurt from my unexpected journey with cancer.

• Entries of interest

• “Sorting It Out”, December 30, 2009, pg. 94
• “Disguising My Pain”, January 5, 2010, pg. 94
• “Integrating My Life Into the Balance of My Future”, February 2, 2010, pg. 95
• “Hold On. Don’t Let Go or Give Up. Just Hold On.”, February 10, 2010, pg. 97
• “Tapestry”, August 26, 2010, pg. 103

Snow Canyon, Utah, March 18, 2010. I met Larry, the man I mentored after his transplant.

Kirk Creek, California, March 22, 2010.  A quiet and reflective time for me . . .

Wendy and I meet! March 23, 2010

The Grand Tetons,Wyoming, August 7, 2010.  Mark and Gail Mizu and Dale and I.

“Tapestry”, August 26, 2010, pg. 103, CaringBridge journal

Book IV – Living Again

April 12, 2011, pg. 105 – Advocate of Hope. My purpose and my call, an advocate of hope.

• “Sailing”, June 23, 2011, pg. 105

July 30, 2011.  Sailing on the NorEastern, Flathead Lake, Montana, USA

My vision and dream of sailing fulfilled.  My journey comes to an end and I find myself whole again.

Always and forever it is my hope and prayer that my journal and blog with will bless and benefit you whether you are a patient, survivor, caregiver or friend. My life verse is Romans 8:28-30, that ALL things work together for good and all to the glory of God! 

Your Voice

I tentatively step out to become a voice of encouragement to you and those you love.  In turn, I want to listen to your voice as you explore your “unasked for” role in cancer.

In my recovery from cancer my voice was buried deep inside me.  I had so many emotions; sad, lonely, relieved, confused, fearful, anxious, grateful, the list could go on.  I knew my complete recovery would come through expressing myself, to hear my voice sort through, adjust and accept my cancer.  When I was finally able to say to someone, “I could die!”, and that someone responded, “Yes, you could”, my healing began.  All I needed to turn around and begin living again was for someone to acknowledge me and my voice.

My premise and purpose for a Christian cancer support group and blog is evolving.  Little did I know the direction my vision would take.

My initial purpose was to offer a Biblically based support group and I am happy to meet with our local group.  Secondly, was this blog.  I created this blog for the support group as well as for the public as an information funnel of articles and links from the Christian community.

My purpose for this blog is shifting; not only is it an information outlet but it is becoming an avenue for expressing our voice, the voice of the patient, survivor, caregiver and friend.

Computer technology and opportunity amaze me, our world has literally opened up and we are able to connect with people we don’t know.  All the information we could want is at our fingertips.  My “older mind” is impressed with the more computer savvy and youthful generation in how they utilize and move around in the cyber world.  I am impressed with churches that have expanded their ministry and services through computer technology and communication.

The computer allows us all a voice without the face; that can be good or bad.  The good side is someone can express themselves or open up without the fear of criticism or judgement seen through body language; they can “verbalize” without interruption in a paragraph or two what is difficult to express face to face.  This blog can offer this “comfort zone.”

My friend Gail and I brainstormed on this concept.  Not only could this blog be an outlet for Christian articles, information and links but also allow you to anonymously and safely express yourself.

I created a new tab above called, “Your Voice” in which you can contact me, no one else can read your comments.  I set this up not as a “counseling” center but as an avenue for you to share your voice that may be buried deep inside you and you feel you can’t share it with any one else.  I will “listen” to you.  You can add a prayer request, too.  If you are looking for feedback, I will answer you.  I am hoping this will be a means of letting go and of healing, questions and answers, sadness and joy, prayer requests and praise.  After I verbalized the “secrets of my heart” my complete healing from cancer began.

As always, if you know of someone who might benefit from this blog site or our cancer support group, please forward my information on – thank you.